When I look inside of myself all I find is trash


“When I look inside of myself, all I find is trash. In the head, in the heart, there’s nothing but trash. Because my own heart wants to deceive me. It wants to make me think I’m more than what I’m not, which is pride. Then again it wants to make me think that I’m less than what I am and so I’m left with a question, who am I really? This whole introspection thing has never really worked out for me”

This is one of the responses I got in relation to the article I wrote on what true happiness really is, you can read about it here.

The number one step was discover and get to know yourself; which involves introspection. The person behind the feedback above introduced himself as a young man. For the sake of confidentiality and this article, I will call him Phillip.

While the feedback above has so many factors that require urgent attention, for this particular post I will cover the part that says, when I look inside my head all I see is trash.

Phillip brought out the word introspection. What is it?

In simpler terms introspection is looking inside yourself to reflect on your thoughts and feelings. And examine what they mean. It is a process of learning about your own mind or simply the act of looking into yourself.

When I look inside of myself all I find is trash

Introspection is synonymous with self analysis, soul searching, heart searching, self reflection, etc.

It will lead you to self discovery.

So according to Phillip, he achieved self discovery and loathed what he learnt about himself. In fact, he still doesn’t know who he really is.

He had a big question mark towards my article because to him, introspection never really worked. Why because when he looks inside all he sees is trash. This alone is a very big problem and a hindrance because it’s impossible for you to love life in general if you never get to love yourself.

If you feel like Phillip, then this post is for you too.

Introspection did worked for me because when I set on a quest to find myself and who I really was, I was grateful to find answers. For me discovering that I’m not weird was a huge relief for me. It was like I was set free and it helped me to stop being like everybody else.

The biggest challenge that Phillip is facing is that because he is stuck in step one, which is discover and know yourself, he may find it a challenge to find true happiness. The worst part of it is that in his quest to get to know himself and he settled for trash. That in itself is a big problem. If I could do a live interview with him I would probe further to ask him why he feels there’s trash inside of him.

But generically, people often find trash inside because the world makes them feel they are not good enough. Because they have failed to live up to certain expectations. Or they have set standards of what they should own up to, but because of circumstances, have failed to live up to their own expectations.

Most often than not, it’s not even society that sets these standards but ourselves. You want to see yourself somewhere, you feel you should be somebody somewhere somehow, but life places you slightly or grossly lower than you had desired. And you end up calling yourself stupid or trash.

Sometimes it’s the people in our lives; the relationships that we engage in, you find that those close to you make you feel you are not good enough. At times according to you, you may be trying so hard and had it not been for the pressure, you could’ve been content where you are and with whom you are. But you have this person (usually parents or partners) that you hold in high esteem pushing and pushing you to the end of your limits. No matter what you do, it’s just not good enough for them.

If you are in such a situation, you are in the right place because I am here to help you. I have been there, I have fought low self esteem, low self worth, lack of purpose and depression and now I am here, free from it all. I did it, you can do it too.

The steps in this article worked for me, but may not really work for you. But don’t despair if these steps don’t work for you right now. Because I will attack this enemy from all angles till you gets to a place of happiness and contentment.

Now you should understand that it’s not a one day’s work, not even one month’s work. It is a lifestyle that you and I are going to choose to live until one day, you will wake up and finds the things that used to bother you, don’t bother you anymore.

Ask me any question privately inbox or right here in the comments section and I will be glad to answer you. You can also schedule for a personalized encounter for the special kind of attention you may need using the forms here.

What exactly don’t like about yourself when you look inside?

Is it something you can change? If yes have you tried changing it? Have the steps you have taken been effective or not? If it is something that you need help with, I will be glad to help. Talk to me here.

Is it something that cannot be changed? Are you sure it can not be changed? OK, if it cannot be changed have you tried modifying it in a way that makes you comfortable?

If it can neither be changed nor modified, is it temporal or permanent? In an event that it is temporal, you may have to master patience and how to wait with grace.

If it is permanent, you may have to accept it and learn to love it while living with it. What ever the case, before you mark it permanent, let’s talk about it. All you may need it to look at it from a different angle. And I am here to help with perspective.

OK, so in conclusion, have you thought of the standards are you using to evaluate yourself for you to mark yourself as trash? If you are using your own standards, be kind to yourself.

Secondly, if those around you make you feel like trash, you have to remember that this is your life. You need to own it. Set your own standards so long they don’t contradict nature and the order of creation. Download your free copy of Seven reasons why you are not trash. Enter your email address below to download.

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