how perfectionism ruins your relationships


Perfectionism is among the traits or behaviours that hurt us and those around us without us trying. It’s hard sometimes to feel good about yourself and to practice self-love when you simply can not fit in anywhere. Your self-esteem will be on the rocks if the people around you don’t really like you or they don’t really enjoy your company. While sometimes this could be due to reasons that you may have little or no control over, sometimes it could be due to how we present ourselves to others. This article will look at 11 steps for getting rid of perfectionism.

Unsuccessful or broken relationships can have a wild toll on your self-esteem and how this may affect the way you feel about yourself in a negative way. Some time back, I shared something awesome about learning how to love yourself. You must have a look at the article because it highlights very important aspects of self-love.

Psychologists have proven that perfectionists tend to be very self-critical, unsatisfied and unhappy.

Perfectionism is a ruthless form of self-slavery.

How to stop being a perfectionist

If you have lost so many good people in your life and you think you may have pushed them away, there’s always hope of recovering lost relationships. If not, you can make a few personal changes so that your future relationships will be different. You can also start by fixing the relationship with yourself.

The only way to become a better person is by first accepting that there’s a problem somewhere. Then dig deeper within yourself to identify where the real problem might be. You must do this with a positive mindset otherwise you will be stuck in rumination and more self-loathing. Learn how to self-introspect the right way here. When you find the answers, don’t curl up in a ball of self-pity and host a self-hate party.

You must strategize. Research, read books and articles, speak to people that have had your experiences and learn how they overcame. Dedicate enough time to your personal development because it will take a considerable amount of time for you to eventually be satisfied with your desired results. Be patient with yourself. This is because as humans we grow gradually and the step you have taken is one towards growth and maturity. Don’t expect to wake up the next morning to find a giant beanstalk outside your window for you to climb to your satisfaction and happiness. There is no magic seed other than your personal efforts, patience, and perseverance in this matter.

11 steps to get rid of perfectionism tendencies.

Re-examine what you base your self-worth on

Let go of the comparison mindset

Practice mindfulness

Practice gratitude

Avoid negative self-judgement

Practice unconditional self-love

Don’t be too judgemental on others

Practice acceptance and tolerance

Try to ignore the faults and focus on the strengths and positives.

Understand that setting realistic and attainable goals is not lowering your standards

Remember, it is not your obligation to fix everyone and everything around you.

Take a self-assessment test to determine if you have issues with perfectionism

11 steps for getting rid of perfectionism.

Do you want to know if you have issues with perfectionism? Enter your email below to download a free Self-Assessment Perfectionism Test tool. If you are subscribed to this blog, you must have the password to my resource library. Simply access the assessment tool from there. If at all you are subscribed and do not have the password, send me an email to request it.

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  1. I have realized that I do have a bit of a perfectionist tendency. It was great while I was in school to push me to do my best, but you’re right, it is tough on a relationship or in my case marriage, so I am having to learn to adjust. Thank you for these 11 helpful tips.

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